The almost casualty of my perfectionism today was delighting in my 2-year olds newfound coloring skills and the fact that I had finally found a “play” activity that I enjoyed as much as my child. The latter of which has been no small feat and believe me I have tried them all.
We began the activity each with our own coloring book, but soon after, she moved towards me and kept attempting to color on the page opposite of the one I was carefully coloring. My first few gestures to shoo her back to her own book were largely out of my immediate awareness, but after the third time I caught myself literally pushing her away, mindfulness thankfully kicked in for me. “What am I doing” I wondered”, the perfectionist in me was quick to pipe up. “She’s going to color outside the lines!” This was quickly followed by perfectionisms’ [sic] good friend, anxietist, who worried what the picture would look like at the end.
Fortunately, for me and for her, I was aware of this silly process going on inside of me. So, I made the values based decision to be with and enjoy my daughter, reveling in the process, instead of being attached to an outcome of how something should be. I would have thought I’d have learned by now after the 2017 pumpkin craft debacle. Guess which one is mine?
